What I'm Thankful For

So I'm just going to be open and honest that I really suffer from anxiety. I've always been a worrier but its been getting worse lately and I think that is because of all of the change in my life. I stopped working, was pregnant and then had baby Sawyer. Now that I'm home more and not working I've noticed its gotten pretty bad....I feel anxious on a daily basis. I'm sure lack of sleep and crazy changes in my hormones help fuel the fire but I do have to be honest and say that my anxiety was an issue long before I became pregnant. I think my Mom's passing has made things worse too. I could always go to her when I was having a hard time and I'm unable to do that now.

I've read that focusing on your blessings from God can help. I've read about people writing in gratitude journals to help them feel better about their circumstances and lessen their anxiety. I do tend to be a glass half empty kind of person and so I've decided to try and do this. God has given me an unbelievable amount of blessings in my life and I truly do not have anything to complain about -although I'm truly looking forward to hearing his reasoning in taking my Mom. I truly believe that He had a very good reason and I often do think about what that is. I'm not angry at him for it....but I do struggle with it a lot.

Anyway, I wanted to come up with five things I am thankful for today -and not the typical my husband, my house, my kids etc. I want to list five deeper things. So here goes:

Anna's rosy red cheeks this morning after coming in from playing in the snow. Thank you God for giving me a healthy five year old, full of energy and joy.

A husband who is outside once again shoveling snow off of our driveway. My next-door neighbor lost her husband several years ago and has no one to help her do this. Thank you God for giving me a healthy husband who never complains about having to work so much to take care of our home.

The beautiful flower that bloomed yesterday and is still displaying its beautiful colors today on my hibiscus tree. My mom and dad bought me the tree for my first Mother's Day when I became pregnant with Anna. It brightens our family room on this cold, snowy morning and is a reminder to me of my Mom's love for me.

Thank you God for letting sweet Sawyer only wake me once each night to be nursed. Thank you for letting him be healthy and precious. Thank you for letting me be able to nurse him each day.

Thank you God for allowing me to stay at home and raise my family. Although I complain about all of the laundry, housework and loneliness it truly is a gift from you that I am able to do this. So many people are not given this opportunity. Thank you for allowing me to have the most important job in the world: taking care of my precious family.